do you ever just want to gently place your hands on someones cheeks and hold their head there in your hands and looking into their eyes and then violently jerk their head on a right angle and snap their neck
You want weird tv episodes that you’ve never seen before? It’s probably been on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. You want a musical episode? Buffy. An episode with no talking at all? Buffy. A good laugh about a demon-hunting dummy? Buffy. What about one where hyena ghosts posses high school students and then go eat their principle? Guess who. Just go watch Buffy you piece of shit.
in all my years that i have been on this earth i have not played spin the bottle once. does this mean that i’ve never actually lived? do a lot of people actually even play spin the bottle? or is its importance and prevalence stretched and exaggerated in media? these are the questions of the hour
Are teen parties with alcohol and red solo cups even real?!!?!
#no but can you imagine if that was how you learned once a month you weren’t pregnant#by some dude singing songs about the victory of it#you wake up and he’s there and you are so happy#this dude becomes your favorite dude#but then you realize you haven’t seen your friend’s minstrel in a while#I mean everyone notices#like half the people are on the same cycle so for one week out of four your job is just flooded with fucking minstrels everywhere#the cacophony#but Mary over there is all alone#and she’s like my minstrel is late#but we all fucking know#her minstrel has gone off to find her a baby#a nine month journey he must make alone#and until he comes back there is no music in her life#what a glorious world this would be#I love the minstrels (@onionjuggler)
jeez i would love to order that thing online, but i don’t know what size to order it in because women’s clothing sizes are determined by the alignments of the planets in relation to the fuck you galaxy